Who is the Monkey?

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Working at a Chinese based/managed company in the United States definitely has its special moments, I mean, how can you break it to a communist CEO that there are actual employment regulations? Honestly, I sort of just got offered this position... but, from hiring, negotiating, reprimanding, firing, investigations, surviving HR in a shady company, dropping at least 5 F-bombs on a solicitor's call, going through boxes of tissue for crying employees, to arguing with management why "pretty" receptionists don't necessarily mean "smart" receptionists... I've done it... and somehow, I'm still laughing.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Unfortune Cookie

Analyst: $10,000
VS
3 Fortune Tellers: $20,000+

Well.... it's only apparent who is better at the job!!!


I’ve been told something quite ridiculous...

As a matter of fact, so ridiculous that it’s borderline funny… ok, it IS funny.

I don’t think there has been any other person in the face of HR that may have this under their belt. This may indeed be a first, and in which case, I seriously request an award.

You see, in many companies, when business, or monetary issues occur, executives and board members will usually come together to discuss a save-all plan, hell, perhaps even spend some dough for an analyst. It’s only logical isn’t it? Well, if one day you decided that being logical just isn’t the way to go… my company is the place for you!

I was asked for everyone’s birthdates just a week ago, a request especially made by the CEO. Gladly, I sent a spiffy PDF fresh off my saved reports. I was just told today however, that for an in depth business analysis, the CEO has hired not 1, but 3 fortune tellers to fly across the globe to review everyone’s birthdates… to (and get this)… assess if his/her role is not only a good fit, but if he/she is a good fit for the CEO himself.

See... I told you it’s sadly ridiculous, yet funny.

Well, I have already advised against this, and have reminded (them) that any results are absolutely against every forsaken code that is out there. Seriously.... OMFG! See what I have to deal with here?!?
Posted by Code Name: Confidential Monkey at 11:10 AM